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I had two older sisters who'd chosen to drop their middle name for their last name, and hyphen their last name, respectively, and for whatever reason, I prided myself on the traditional glory of keeping my middle name intact and dropping my "maiden name." [Giggle.]
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So imagine my surprise when, on the first night of our honeymoon, the hostess at dinner said "Let me show you to your table, Mrs. Moeller," and I was completely caught off guard.
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"Mrs. Moeller? How old does she think I am? I am a Russell, MA'AM, and who do you think you are, calling me 'Mrs.?" I thought.
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The gut reaction blind-sided me, and to my complete surprise, I was overcome with distaste. And it was written all over my face. Aaron shot me a look that said, "Pull yourself together, that is your name." I shook myself out of it just in time to see the terrified look on the hostesses face. "No, you pronounced it correctly." [Sheepish what-just-happened-here eye roll.] "Thank you."
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Whew. What the heck?
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That was the moment I realized that changing your name is changing part of your identity, and I hadn't been treating that change with the respect that it deserved.
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Less than two weeks later I have still not adjusted to being called "Mrs."
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Mrs. Moeller is my mother-in-law, and I'd prefer to not share a name. I mean zero offense to the Mrs. Moeller that precedes me--but I am my own person, and I'm quickly learning that I can't handle sharing a name. Granted, technically three weeks ago my third sister and I were both Miss Russell, but I've never called her Miss Russell, and I think that makes a difference.
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I have jumped on board with Amy Moeller, and I love when Aaron says "my wife" [giggle, giggle], but I have decided that in another decade when our kids' friends have to refer to me, it will be by "Mrs. Amy;" and I'm quite alright with that.
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Now I need to make a date with the Social Security Administration, but in the meantime, I've changed it on Facebook. And isn't that what really makes it official?
