You can’t pour from an empty cup. You can’t squeeze water from a rock. You can’t tackle the problems of others if you haven’t been taking care of yourself.
Self-care is more than just a trendy hashtag, but rather a legitimate wellness concept with origins in the medical community. People in those high-stress or high-risk jobs, such as doctors, trauma workers, social workers, or EMTs, need a way to combat the emotional toll the days take on them.
There’s no denying that talking about self-care is trendy—Google Trends, which tracks statistics surrounding what folks look up on the Internet—reported that queries for self-care began to double at the end of 2016. It correlates to society’s increased interest in wellness, which is about experiencing positive health (physically and mentally) rather than simply the absence of illness.
It often feels like prioritizing others—your kids, your spouse, your boss and his endless list of pointless tasks—is honorable. The truth is that when you neglect yourself, no one benefits. Rather than seeing self-care as a passing fad, see the surge as an opportunity to put yourself first, even if it’s only once in a while.
Why Is Practicing Self-Care So Hard to Do?
Activities that are labeled as “self-care” are often enjoyable, and yet they’re put on the back burner so often. Why is that? A few reasons:
It takes effort. Practicing self-care in a way that positively affects your mental and physical health is a lot harder than it seems in theory. Sure, lying on the couch in front of Friends reruns and playing Candy Crush doesn’t take a lot of effort, but it’s also not really a healthy form of self-care. That’s not to say you shouldn’t do it, as those mindless evenings are truly necessary sometimes—but it’s not self-care.
“Busy” is glorified. In 2012, essayist Tim Krieder wrote a piece, “The Busy Trap,” in The New York Times. It went viral in its explanation of how being “busy” can be seen as a synonym for being important. “[Being busy] serves as a kind of existential reassurance, a hedge against emptiness,” Krieder noted. “Obviously, your life cannot possibly be silly or trivial or meaningless if you are so busy, completely booked, in demand every hour of the day.”
It’s seen as selfish. Americans have a serious guilt complex and a misunderstanding of the difference between self-care and self-indulgence. Too many people feel like they should be doing something “better,” like cleaning, working, or spending time with their kids, rather than participating in an activity that’s solely for their own benefit. “I don’t deserve this,” they think. “I’m not good enough for this.”
Here’s the thing: You are worthy of self-care, even when it takes time away from other important tasks or people. It can be as simple as stretching for a few minutes, as indulgent as going on a mini-vacation, or any one of these 15 ways to practice self-care, all of which have research backing the benefits they provide for your mental and physical health.
1
Stretching
Put this one in the “feels so good but takes so much effort” category, at least when you do it right—and that means giving yourself 10 to 15 minutes daily of solid stretches for your whole body. Flexibility training (the in-the-know term for stretching) is linked to increased blood flow in the muscles and lower blood pressure, according to a 2016 study from the American Journal of Physiology-Heart and Circulatory Physiology, which can lower overall stress. Additionally, research done on surgeons that was published in the Annals of Surgery concluded that targeted stretching micro-breaks improved mental focus and reduced pain. There’s no need to get into a full-fledged yoga routine if that’s not your thing. Touch your toes, twist your spine, and roll your neck until you feel the stretch, and then hold it for 20 to 30 seconds at a time.
2
Mini-Vacays
This one might feel like self-indulgence, but it’s definitely self-care, too. It’s easy to skip traveling because it seems like it requires too much time away from work or money that, let’s face it, is earmarked for other things. There is very real evidence, though, that putting vacations on the backburner does more harm than good, at least when it comes to your health. They cut back on stress, according to a study from the American Psychological Association, as well as reduce your overall risk of death by 20 percent (and the risk of death from heart disease by 30 percent). Research from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention determined that women who took the least amount of vacation time—once every six years or less—were eight times more likely to have a heart attack than those who get away at least twice a year. Even anticipating a getaway can boost happiness, according to research in Psychological Science, so start planning the next getaway as soonas you get back from one mini-vacation.
3
Snuggle with a Furry Friend
(or Adopt One!)
Dog, cats, guinea pigs, ferrets—you love them, but they’re stressful, right? Luckily, your pets’ cuteness has some serious benefits to it, including υ
Social support: Animals might not talk, but Journal of Personality and Social Psychology research found that people with serious health challenges, like HIV or a recent heart attack, do better if they have a pet because they feel more supported.
Lower cholesterol: People, especially men, with pets tend to have lower cholesterol and triglycerides, says Australian National Heart Foundation researchers.
Stress relief: When you look at that cutey-patootie ball of fur, your body releases a super-powerful chemical, oxytocin, while decreasing cortisol, the stress hormone. Findings from research from the State University of New York at Buffalo noted that blood pressure response to stress is cut in half for cat and dog owners.
4
Declutter
Your House (or Desk or Car or...)
Remember—self-care isn’t always easy nor incredibly fun, and this particular task proves it. However, taking the time to declutter your surroundings is indeed the ultimate in self-care because it’s a chore that’s easy to set aside but gives an extraordinary sense of relief and pleasure when it’s done. Clutter actually builds both stress and depression—particularly if other people notice it—found a Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin study, while other research from the Journal of Neuroscience noted that clutter overstimulates the brain and makes it hard to focus. The cure (hopefully): a serious decluttering session.
5
Let theProfanity Fly
Swearing might not be proper etiquette, but just letting it loose can make a difference in your health. Why is the simple act of speech considered self-care? Sometimes you need to give yourself permission to break from being polite, which can be tough for some folks. However, research indicates that using profanity not only increases your ability to tolerate pain—like if you step on a Lego or pinch your finger—but also gives you a sense of control over a difficult situation, which boosts self-esteem and confidence. Don’t take this as permission to speak like a mouthy sailor, though, because the benefits only go far before studies show it starts to detract from a healthy, happy life.
6
Read a Book
How many times have you heard someone say (or thought to yourself), “I would love to read more, but I just don’t have the time”? Make the time! Findings from the University of Sussex noted that reading just six minutes a day reduces stress levels by up to 68 percent, while other research determined that reading helps boost memory and prevents age-related cognitive decline by forming new neural circuits. If you’re not sure what to pick up first, check out what’s trending on Amazon Books or book-logging website Goodreads. As of this writing, 2018’s most popular books on Goodreads are The Woman in the Window, a thriller by A.J. Finn, The Great Alone, by Kristin Hannah, and nonfiction memoir Educated, by Tara Westover.
7
Diffuse Your Favorite Scents
Essential oils have exploded in popularity over the past few years for myriad intensions, including cleaning, pain relief, and even as an insect repellent. However, one of the oils’ original purposes, aromatherapy, could be an alternative therapy for symptoms of depression and other chronic medical conditions, according to a review of studies published in the Journal of Alternative and Complementary Medicine. Aromatherapy may work by stimulating receptors in the nose, which send messages to the limbic system, which controls emotions in the brain, via the nervous system, says the Mayo Clinic. Pick out one or more of these scents to diffuse to potentially help:
Lavender • Jasmine • BasilRose • Chamomile • Geranium
8
Flip on Your Favorite TV Comedy
The experts say this is the golden age of television, and the bevy of streaming sources available means that your favorite funny episodes—whether it’s Modern Family, Friends, MASH, or I Love Lucy—are at your fingertips. Laughter therapy is a legitimate tactic for improving quality of life and decreasing stress and anxiety, and one of the easiest ways to take part is to watch a hilarious TV show. When you laugh, the stress hormones cortisol and epinephrine decrease, while dopamine and serotonin, which regulate joy, increase.
9
Volunteer toHelp Others
There’s a fine line where volunteering transforms from self-care into something much less healthy. If you can keep on the right side of that line, volunteering supports long-term positive physical and mental health outcomes, including—but not limited to—more satisfaction with life, decreased symptoms of depression, and lower blood pressure, according to multiple studies, including one from Carnegie Mellon University that found around 200 hours of volunteering per year correlated to better physical health. What about that aforementioned fine line? Well, it’s easy to over-commit and turn the altruistic intentions into feelings of stress and resentment.
10
Listen toSad Music
It might sound counterintuitive, but listening to sad music can make you feel better, both when you’re down in the dumps and when you’re in a good mood. Research from 2014 found that sad music can evoke positive feelings, including peacefulness and kindness, as well as boost empathy. If the song makes you cry, that may be all the better—sometimes you need that cathartic release of tears.
11
Listen to Happy Music, Too!
Of course, you don’t want to listen to sad music exclusively; you need those upbeat tunes, too! A significant amount of research supports the idea that music has an impact on mental and physical health, including a 2011 Canadian study that noted that listening to music increases the brain’s production of the mood-enhancing chemical dopamine, as well as another set of findings that listening to music reduces pain and anxiety.
12
Dance It Out
While that music is on, you might as well double-down on the self-care. Dancing isn’t just a great form of cardio but also a pretty awesome way to stave off dementia, if you can believe it. Researchers followed folks for more than five years to determine which leisure activities helped reduce the risk of developing Alzheimer’s disease, finding that dancing was one of them (also good choices: reading, board games, and musical instruments).
13
Plan a Friend Date
Your social life makes more of a difference for your health than you might realize—in fact, good relationships with friends make more of a difference than those with family members, particularly once you’re a little bit older, says a 2017 study from the University of Michigan that involved more than 270,000 people from 100 countries. It’s not just about having friends, though, but having quality friends. People who report that friends are a source of stress suffer from more chronic illnesses; those who say friends are a source of support tend to be happier.
14
Cook aNutritious Meal
There are a few healthy habits at play here: First, simply eating healthy foods, mainly fruits and vegetables, is one of the ultimate acts of self-care. There’s no need to explain the myriad ways that nutritious food supports physical and mental health; however, it’s not just about what you eat. Taking the time to plan out your meals is linked to a better diet and healthier weight, according to a study published in the International Journal of Behavioral Nutrition and Physical Activity.
15
Look atSomething Cute
It might be your kids. It could be your dog. It might even be your spouse! Sure, they’re all cutie-patooties, which give you a health boost. If none of those options are available, though, just some adorable Internet pictures will provide you with the healthy, happy fuzzy-wuzzies, too. It can even make you more productive at the office (no, really!) A study published in 2012 in PLoS One examined the effect of Kawaii, the Japanese word for “cute,” on university students, finding that viewing pictures of puppies and kittens boosted focus, improved mood, and benefitted productivity. If your boss catches you, it wasn’t our fault.
